MormongirlzAn Orgasm for Each Sister Wife (2016)

Karley Sciortino (the editor of Slutever) did a report for Vice back in early 2017 juxtaposing Utah’s efforts to ban pornography as a public health menace with the lapsed LDS woman who started Mormongirlz.

At it’s best, Vice is indispensable. However, it’s only at it’s best maybe 15% of the time. The only thing that really stood out about it to me was the attention to authentic detail during Mormongirlz production. There appeared to be a real effort exerted to make something that was both recognizably fluent in Mormon culture and code but that uses this knowledge to subvert sex-negative stigmas.

That should’ve motivated me to check them out sooner but I haven’t. Then I saw this slide by on my feed.

Full disclosure: I‘m not completely on board with everything presented here. As someone who is a survivor of both sexual assault and intimate partner violence, the absence of continual, verbally affirmative consent is a baseline requirement for me.

That being said: as a switch who is a little bit more bottom leaning, I’ve had fantastic sex as a result of having a partner take what they want from me without asking first. (I really, really have been feeling a strong need of late to have a lesbian push me up against a wall, grab my tits hard enough to leave bruises, shove her tongue down my throat and then hold me against the wall by my neck while she uses her free hand to get me off multiple times.)

Yet, with porn, I do think there is a responsibility to convey the importance of asking for a receiving consent at all times. The way this starts makes me very uncomfortable. I’m sure it’s fine that it starts off seeming non-consensual and then the coercion transforms into a willingness to participate. But in the absence of any signifiers of respecting consent, it just follows that a little coercion is fine as long as it becomes consenting at some point.

I’m not cool with that.

Still, this gets the fashions of not just Mormonism but also fits with my understanding of Xtian fundamentalists. The confluence of repressive religious symbology with experimental sexual exploration is something that I can’t tell you whether it’s hot because it’s transgressive or if it’s transgressive because it’s something I find so damn hot.

The other thing I like about it is that although it’s definitely produced to cater to the male gaze, there are wonderful moments that aren’t male gaze-y (the glee with which the woman with the red hair is told to turn over and the way she gleefully complies, the scene later in the scene where the woman with the black hair is kneeling on the floor and we see her making eye contact with the redhead whom she’s going down on and the way there’s a focus on stopping to kiss before switching who gives and who receives–personally, one of my favorite things about sex is kissing after all the parties have come and the way you can taste a mix of your own fluids and your partners fluids on lips and tongues is one of my favorite human experiences; and I don’t really like the way I taste that much but I’ll not waste a single drop when I’m with someone else.)

I don’t think it’s artful or even especially high quality as far as production facets go but I’ve gotten myself off to this video 7 times in the last 36 hours and that is likely going to become 8 as soon as I save this draft to my queue.

aprivateexpose:

One of the highlights from our first ever threesome last week 😍 We’re lucky to have such beautiful and open minded friends to help make our fantasies come true. We’ve been fantasizing about this for so long and had such a lovely time and learned we really enjoy having sex in front of people. Follow us for more, there’s over 500 photos from the night. Full color ones too 😉

@aprivateexpose’s stated intent is to: “dance around that fine line between art and pornography”.

I feel like the above set does some things well and other things less well.

Let’s start with the bad and move toward the good.

I think the 3rd image from the top is extremely problematic. It’s very stereotypical male gaze porn movie POV shot. It decapitates both parties which in turn reduces the scene to an almost mechanical heteronormative essentialism of sexual intercourse and frames the scene to emphasize both a male POV as well as the bondage aspect. (Alternately, I really do love the way his hands serve as a frame within a frame and the way the do so reads as strangely reverential.)

However, in the 3rd picture is presented as part of a series of 4 images. And that connection does at least establish context, i.e. a group sex scenario. (And I love how the person standing to the side is presented as ostensibly focused on taking a hit on the bowl she’s holding and then the way the second frame hides the dude’s face with his hair so that the punctum of the frame becomes the Cheshire grins of the two ladies.

The final frame is less male gaze-y (remember the viewer always subconsciously associates the bottom of the frame with the fourth wall, so this to me is less creepy than the 3rd image.

I don’t think any of the images work independently of each other. Presenting them in this way makes them work as a whole–however, since what works with each frame doesn’t ever really fully integrate with the tableau, I am left with the sense that although this is a good bit more contemplative w/r/t the firewalling of pornography as a subject for art than most work on Tumblr, it separates the totality of impact across four frames and in so doing dilutes the artistic impetus in favor of the more erogenously charged documentary fixation. (In other words, the good things I mentioned about the work could conceivably all be staged so that they all might comfortably coexist within a single, static frame.

[↑] Lisa YuskavageReclining Nude (2009); [↖] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [↗] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [+] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [←] Helias DoulisUntitled from Blossoms of Solitude (2016); [→] Alexandre HaefeliUntitled from The Company of Men series (2016); [-] Source unknown – Title Unknown (2014); [↙] Ismael GuerrierSacred Garden #1 (2018); [↘] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [↓] Source unknown – Title unknown (19XX)

Follow the thread.

[↖] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X) ; [↗] Source unknown – Title unknown {desaturated} (201X); [↑] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [^] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X);[←] Source unknown – Title unknown {desaturated} (201X);  [→] Source unknown – Title unknown {desaturated} (201X); [↙] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [↘] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [-] Devils Film – Transsexual Gangbangers #19 feat. Annabelle Lane {desaturated} (2017); [↓] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X)

To be free of fear is to be full of Love.
Adyashanti 

Carlos SaezHuman Appearance Optional (2017)

By way of explanation, Saez posits this piece as “a multiprocess collage inspired by morphological freedom and group sex.”

My first thought was that it was hentai adjacent–it’s hard to see tentacles in any sort of sexually charged context without immediately going there.

I didn’t pick up on the graphic depictions of sexual intercourse; the is-it-a-glazed-ceramic sculpture-or-2D-painting aesthetic makes the viscous fluid like masses look like a swirled mass of organs or perhaps organs modeled from oobleck.

What finally clued me in to the sexually explicit aspects was the rebar/vaccuum hose penetration in the third image from the top. From there on it’s a treat to follow the whorls, swirls and plasticine florishes. To see things as sexual, visceral (in the sense of viserca), effluvial discharge and then as piece of a collage. (For example: the abs in the final image are not the same as but remind me of the cover for Chuck Palaniuk’s novel Choke.)

The fluidity of these constructions resonates with a project I’m in the preliminary phases of researching. However, the more I look at it the more I’m realizing two things:

I’m really into psychedelia. I love psychedelics and am even more fond of music made to be more fully experienced in altered states. But psychedelic visual art leaves quite a bit to be desired. The fractals and DMT inspired spirit realms are interesting. Someone like Alex Grey has a fantastic sense of design and visual flow–but it all leaves me feeling like I’ve lived on nothing but Oreos and Mt. Dew for several days. It’s mostly eye candy with little if any sustenance. (If I wanna stare at fractals, I’ll jump down into an Islamic art K-hole.)

But what I realized about the above image is that in so far as it appears sculptural it actually has a fair degree of overlap with Rococo sculpture, actually. It’s partly the way Rococo was primarily decorative in nature, favored a pastel palette and emphasized serpentine lines and asymmetrical compositions. (And that strikes me as a shortcoming of most psychedelic visual art because there is a focus on symmetry as a means of parsing the load universe into cannon, aim at brain, pull trigger reality of the experience of getting really fucking high. In the process of writing this I’ve been looking at a bunch of rococo art and I think it’s actually more in line with the way I experience ‘visionary’ states.

[↖] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [↗] Lucas Entertainment – Wall Street feat. Ben Andrews & Rafael Alencar (2009); [↑] Cocky BoysDillon & Max Go Fishin’ {desaturated} (2012); [←] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [→] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [↓] Source unknown – Title unknown (201X); [<] Vixen.comBad Girl feat. Cadey Mercury & Xander Corvus {desaturated} (2017); [>] PornProsWet Toy Slut feat. Kelly Diamond (2014); [↙] Hustler – Casey Young and Tiffany Taylor (2008); [↘] Source unknown – Title unknown {desaturated} (201X)

Juxtaposition as commentary

The Tiger and the PilgrimFriends. (2016)

This photo was made using Kodak’s 800 ISO Portra emulsion.

The higher the speed of a film, the better it is at producing photographs in low-light settings; however, the higher the speed the more visible the grain.

It’s also a film that is optimized for tungsten light sources, i.e. the color temperature of light emitted by most incandescent light bulbs.

It’s also low contrast—as a result of which this image suffers. It also doesn’t help that it was made using at the minimum a ceiling mounted overhead lighting fixture. (In other words: some of the most aesthetically unappealing light imaginable.)

But I’m here for what this depicts more than how it’s depicted.

I’ve been aware of the Folsom Street Fair since well before I started this blog. However, my conception of it has been off.

Basically, I had understood it as Pride only for leather and BDSM folks. It seems it’s quite a bit more than a celebratory parade. I’m not entirely clear on the rules governing it but it does seem to be closer to an open air sex party.

A while back adult content creator and performer Chelsea Poe (of whom and of whose work I am a tremendous fan) posted several images of her being dominated by Eden Alexander publicly at the Folsom Street Fair.

As kids these days are fond of saying: #AllTheFeels

The images of Ms. Poe tied to a tree reminded me of the above photo. In both cases a woman is physically restrained in a public space and she has consented to having her boundaries tested.

I’ll admit that it’s a tenuous connection. But it’s something I keep coming back to and I think I’ve finally figured out how to articulate something about it but it’s going to involve rather a good bit of TMI.

Give or take: I began masturbating when I was eight.

It wasn’t like I was horny. In fact—it was only vaguely tied up with anything sexual. It was more curiosity.

With hindsight, I realize that this curiosity was informed as a result of being molested when I was six. I didn’t understand the contradiction of the extreme interest on the part of my abuser with the parts of my body that I was otherwise told over and over and again and again were sinfully unclean.

Quite by accident, I discovered that by touching myself in very particular ways (read: humping my pillow), I could trigger this warm and fuzzy tingling sensation. I’d hump, feel myself start to climax, pause, ride the wave of the sensation and as it ebbed I’d go right back to humping my pillow, chasing the next endorphin rush. Sessions usual involved 4 to 7 orgasms.

I knew instinctively that because what I was doing involved the parts between my thighs, that it was something about which I shouldn’t ever tell anyone.

I think I figured out what I was doing was termed masturbation when I was eleven. My instinct not to tell anyone about it made a lot more sense…

Two things happened more or less simultaneously. Puberty struck and the way I masturbated shifted. Whereas previously, I would have spent an hour or so more or less continually stimulating myself with intermittent pauses; I started to experience more forceful orgasms. Like before I would feel the sense of release building, I would feel myself pass the rubicon and then my body would lock up. I would orgasm and then my intimate parts would be painfully sensitive.

I still needed the same endorphin rush but it took me sometimes as long as a half an hour before I could begin again.

The second thing that happened was that my peers and I were informed that masturbation was a mortal sin. It was presented in the following fashion. Girls were generally not interested in it and those who were didn’t because they weren’t gross floozies. Boys who were good Xtians didn’t and boys who weren’t strong Xtians might but they should repent and sin no more.

We were told that if we were freaks who experienced urges that we should pray that God removes the impure thoughts and desires from our hearts.

For the better part of a year, every time I felt the need to get myself off. I would pray. But unlike masturbation—which always felt like a prayer and an answer to that prayer; my actual prayers to God, never went any higher than the ceiling.

I feel it’s also important to note that although I conceptualized masturbation as sexual behavior, it was all but devoid of causal connection. It was something I did for the dopamine hit to my system.

It didn’t shift to being sexual until I was in my late teens.

There was this episode the reboot of The Outer Limits in the mid-90s staring Alyssa Milano. I remember being so aroused that it physically hurt.

The next day while I was in the shower—the only place I had any privacy—I masturbated but as I passed the point of no return, I kept seeing flashbacks to the show from the previous night and instead of stopping I climaxed once and without any pause came again after roughly three minutes.

It was a game changer.

I have no idea what prerequisites have to be satisfied for me to have multiple orgasms while masturbating. I’ve managed it roughly a dozen times—each time seemingly isolated from the rest.

I have substantially better luck with partners.

I think part of it is comparable to solving a chess problem vs figuring out how to get out of check without fucking yourself when you are playing against an actual opponent. In the first case, you control both the moves and countermoves in advance; in the second, you only have a vantage to the moves you make. Someone can make a move that surprises or confounds you.

A better analogy may be found contained within the observation that it is impossible to tickle yourself.

What I’ve discovered with a partner is that my experience of sexual pleasure is analogous to a river—the water level rises and falls depending upon other factors.

If the water overflows, there’s a levee to safely channel the excess. However, any overflow into the levee gets processed by my body as a pain sensation.

Even when it’s happening to me, I wouldn’t label it pain. It’s merely an amplification of sensitivity to a point that although I crave the sensation, my body actively revolts and recoils from continued stimulation.

The act of refusing to cater to this instinctive recoil from continued stimulation in the face of heightened sensitivity is called post-orgasm torture.

There are an increasing number of videos out there for it. As a lesbian, I’m very put off by anything I’ve ever seen involving femme folk subjected to post-orgasm torture. (Another reason I am into the above photo—it seems post-orgasm torture-y but in a way that is an intense as it is consensual.)

I end up watching a fair amount of content featuring post-orgasm torture involving masc. folks. (For example: this one—although vertically oriented video is never acceptable—is pretty run of the mill; this one is over-long, poorly edited and the technique is a little galling in it’s heteronormativity—also, I think the boy, contrary to the on-screen count, only orgasms twice, I think the rest are just leaks despite his concerted efforts at avoiding ejaculation. His response when he does actually finish and the way he responds to continued stimulation is one of the best documents of a body’s response to post-orgasm torture that I have ever seen.)

What does all this have to do with the initial photo? Well, given the way her back is arched and the way the vibrator is pressed vacuum seal tight against her genitalia—it’s probably understandable how I’d make the leap to this as a depiction of post orgasm torture.

The fact that she also appears to be the singular focus of a group of people is also appealing. (As someone who is over-stimulated any time there are more than four people in a room at a time, the social over-stimulation combined with physical over-stimulation is also something I would like to explore.)

The Chelsea Poe images make me curious as to whether a scenario like the image above might be possible at the Folsom Street Fair. The thought of being publicly subjected to post-orgasm torture while very publicly restrained is a prospect that I’m into. As long as I was blindfolded and trusted my dom to not let obviously creepy people touch me, I would be into a modicum of crowd participation.

And I think that’s the ultimately realization that engaging with this photo over the span of several years has made me realize that it’s not that I’m not into BDSM/kink, it’s that my relationship with it is very specific. I don’t want to be humiliated. Being humiliated is a massive turn off for me. I also don’t get the pain as pleasure exchange; mine has more to do with pushing the limits of pleasure so they pass through pain and back into pleasure again.